Yes, your eyes do not deceive you - I am indeed writing a blog post! Rejoice and spread the good word!
Nah, I know I've been very much on the down low as of late. I was thinking about it and I think last year there was just so much in my head that I just needed to get it all out via whichever channels available or my brain would actually explode. I think all of this outpouring was my own form of self-therapising and trying to process everything that had been going on.
I now feel in a much better place, though. I'm still creating, but I don't feel like my brain is stuck on 100% with a million different things all fighting for control and attention. I'm, dare I say it... happy?
Evidently finding a good woman does that to you! To be with someone who is incredibly kind, caring, and accepts and even likes me for me is a whole different experience.
Not going to lie, at times the BPD can still make things difficult for me. While all of my triggered reactions are internally focused (ie. I don't just suddenly get angry and go psycho) it's still a lot to deal with on a personal level. Splitting and in an instant your feelings on this person you adore have suddenly flipped to intense thoughts of "well fuck you, I fucking hate you" over anything as trivial such as a tiny miscommunication is really distressing.
Still getting used to it, to be honest, but am working through these internal blips and absolutely making the most of the feelings of happiness. Every day I'm just thankful for that and I just feel really blessed.
Past my romantic proclamations, everything else is going good.
Me and the girls got the b-sides album out, and my own album, HIEROPHANT, is out real soon too. Aaaaand I've already started on ideas for PEN-15 #4(!).
My assignment for this album is - WRITE FROM A HAPPY PLACE. And I am doing just that. It's still going to have bite, but definitely a, generally speaking, positive bite - no gazing into the abyss of infinite sadness!
With the upcoming album I'm going to keep this one short anyways; I figure from a (ha!) PR perspective it might look weird if anyone comes on here to look up my album (hey, it might happen!) and I'm just rambling on about Gundams or something.
There will be a Q&A piece coming up soon with Donna and me talking about HIEROPHANT anyways.
So, I wish you well, and I wish you happiness, and may God guide you on your quest*
Much love,
Ivy xoxo
*fyi that last part is a Michael Scott quote, the Lord very much continues to evade me
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